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The Man Who Couldn't Eat

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“I’m a glutton in a greyhound’s body, a walking contradiction, in the grip of the one thing I can’t have—food.”

Food is not just sustenance. It is memories, a lobster roll on the beach in Maine; heritage, hot pastrami club with a half-sour pickle; guilty pleasures, a chocolate rum-soaked Bundt cake; identity, vegetarian or carnivore. Food is the sensuality of a ripe strawberry or a pork chop sizzling on the grill. But what if the very thing that keeps you alive, that bonds us together and marks occasions in our lives, became a toxic substance, an inflammatory invader? In this beautifully written memoir, both gut-wrenching and inspiring, award-winning writer Jon Reiner explores our complex and often contradictory relationship with food as he tells the story of his agonizing battle with Crohn’s disease—and the extraordinary places his hunger and obsession with food took him.

The Man Who Couldn’t Eat is an unvarnished account of a marriage in crisis, children faced with grown-up fears, a man at a life-and-death crossroads sifting through his past and his present. And it shows us a tough, courageous climb out of despair and hopelessness. Aided by the loving kindness of family, friends, and strangers and by a new approach to food, Reiner began a process of healing in body and mind. Most of all, he chose life—and a renewed appetite, any way he could manage it, for the things that truly matter most.

314 pages, Hardcover

First published September 6, 2011

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Jon Reiner

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 100 reviews
Profile Image for whimsicalmeerkat.
1,275 reviews57 followers
August 13, 2012
Ugh. The amount of self-pity Jon Reiner displays throughout this book made it nigh unreadable. When I entered the giveaway for The Man Who Couldn't Eat, it was based on descriptions of the book as unique, compelling, and a very real depiction of what it is like to have Crohn's disease, from the point of view of someone with a special relationship with food. Instead, I received a book which seems to have been written from the point of view of a man who feels he is unique in having what is actually a sadly common disease. There are references to how hard it is for others to cope with his illness, but they seem to still be in light of how it makes him feel. Overall, this is not a book about a disease, this is a book about a man wallowing in self-pity.

Disclaimer: I received an advance review copy of this book for free through the Goodreads First Reads giveaway program.
Profile Image for Josephine.
139 reviews15 followers
October 1, 2011
When I was in high school, I worked at an insurance company during the summers doing thankless little tasks like filing.

Between getting paper cuts upon paper cuts, I did something I was told not to do — I’d sit at a desk and read through the long-term disability claims as I was filing.

There was this one man’s claim that I still remember to this day.

He was a 28-year-old with beautiful, spidery handwriting. In his claim, he described how Crohn’s disease had robbed him of the ability to leave the house, nevermind going back to work.

It’s weird, but I still remember this — and I can’t help but think about all the number of times that people feel invisible and unnoticed by the world, not realizing that, in a weird, random way, someone out there is thinking about them and wondering if they’re okay.

I found myself thinking about this guy when I started reading “The Man Who Couldn’t Eat” by Jon Reiner, who describes a near-fatal collapse due to complications from his chronic battle with Crohn’s Disease.

From that point, he was forbidden from eating food, fed intravenously, and tortured by his incessant hunger.

In one chapter, he describes his family having a meal that he cannot participate in.

“Now I’m bent in a twisted position by the kitchen stove, and the hunger is driving me mad. I crave food more than sex. The smell and touch of food in our apartment can drop me to my knees. I think about it constantly, more desperately as the months wear on, an obsession that magnifies a craved bite of the ordinary into surreal portions.” (p.106)

Later, he writes: “Anyone who’s ever starved for a day, for medical or religious or financial reasons, knows the torture of moving along the sidewalk and having every pizza aroma within five blocks knock you down blind. Imagine getting provoked every day in the confining walls of your own home with meat, vegetables, sauces, and brownies coursing the plate.” (p.126)

You know, reading this book gave me a profound appreciation for my health and standard of living — which I think a lot of us take for granted because we don’t have to think twice about rummaging through the cupboards for something to eat when we’re hungry or indulging in something unhealthy when the craving overtakes us.

While a lot of people will largely see this as a “food memoir,” I saw this as a poignant reminder of never taking for granted good health.

I thought this was a remarkable and beautiful memoir that was definitely worth reading — I can’t even begin to say enough how much this book made me appreciate my good health and the circumstances under which I’m living.
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
10 reviews
February 20, 2012
I really wanted to like this book. I was diagnosed with Crohn's in 2008 and my journey to remission was a rough one. However, Reiner's self-righteousness and pseudoscientific tangents were really off-putting.

For someone as obsessed with food and the nature of Crohn's disease as Reiner, his understanding of the relationship between food, inflammatory bowel syndrome, and the body was disturbing. The macrobiotic is the opposite of what a healing Crohn's patient should be eating, as the fiber and residue content is too high. While Reiner's gastroenterologist stressed this fact, he disregarded his doctor's advice in favor of a crackpot "nutritionist" and an anti-medicine philosophy. Protein (yes, especially animal protein) is a crucial element to building up one's system after a severe Crohn's attack. I was horrified to read that Reiner had passed over medically-recommended diets for Crohn's patients (such as low-residue or gluten-free) in favor of yin and yang.

This isn't to say that all "alternative" medicine is to be shunned. Probiotics, specific vitamin supplements, and other preventative measures are key in reaching and maintaining remission. However, the macrobiotic diet has been criticized by the American Cancer Society and has even led to several malnutrition deaths. This is NOT a valid treatment for a chronic autoimmune disease.

While Reiner loved to whine about the impact his disease had on family finances, he made little effort to reduce the blow. He was too prideful to accept disability benefits, but had no problem blowing cash on quack nutritionists, high-end food products, and numerous vacations. Of course, trying to get a full-time job was deemed a waste of his time. Instead of devoting his energy to improving his lot, he decided to pick on little league parents for serving snacks to kids. Absurd.

Reiner's ridiculous health philosophies aside, the writing style was not my cup of tea. Reiner insisted on repeating the same empty phrases over and over again as if context would magically give them meaning. "Show me what you crave and I'll show you what you are." You would think that he'd understand that his cravings are his body's way of alerting him to specific nutritional deficiencies, not some sort of silly extension of his personality. Of course you crave fattening foods! You have a chronic illness that prevents fat absorption and you're forty pounds underweight!

If you want to understand the daily life of a person with Crohn's disease, steer clear of this book. It provides a very limited, food-centric, uninformed perspective of day-to-day life with chronic illness. It's not always about dramatic intestinal ruptures or TPN. Crohn's affects more than the diet and the gut. It changes everything from energy levels to blood protein to bone density. It's not something you only think about when sitting down to eat a meal.

Suck it up, Reiner. Stop whining, listen to your doctor, and start enjoying your life and your wonderful family instead of dwelling on your disease and food.
Profile Image for Tzipora.
207 reviews172 followers
December 16, 2011
I'm very torn on how to rate this book. And also torn on how to review it.

In general, memoirs of health issues probably only really appeal to a fairly small of group of people. I do not have Crohn's disease like the author but I do have a very severe digestive system disorder. And like the author I am dependent on Total Parenteral Nutrition (TPN), a form of nutrition that bypasses the digestive tract entirely. You get all your nutritional needs through your veins. And like the author I have NPO (nothing by mouth) for extended periods of time although unlike the author there is no expected recovery for me so maybe that makes my outlook different.

I LOVED the beginning of this book when Jon Reiner discusses his feelings towards being on TPN. For that reason alone I wanted to recommend it to my friends and family. I could relate so much. However, as the book went on I had more and more trouble relating and am not sure I'd recommend it to anyone. The bulk of this book, as other have mentioned, is a lot of whining. At one point the author even addresses the fact that others have pointed out that TPN saved his life (as it has mine). TPN is definitely a life saver for all who need it but Mr. Reiner is too busy complaining. Even when he addresses the lifesaving aspect he seems to state it's not enough. He only spends 3 months on TPN and NPO and never in all that time does he ever come to accept the TPN or his illness. And this bothered me immensely. The author's Crohn's goes more or less into remission by the time the books ends so on some level he never really has to accept it. This is unfortunate and the book could've been so much better and of much more use to so many people if it had been a story of learning to cope with a severe and chronic illness. Instead it's a whining lament.

If you're going to write a memoir, you need to be a likeable person and as the novel progresses, the author becomes more and more unlikeable with his his ranting and whining. Yes, it SUCKS to be NPO. And TPN can be a total pain. And this kind of situation is rare but most people I have ever spoken to in a similar situation have dealt with it better and honestly have far more inspiring stories. Jon Reiner seems to think he's the only one with these kinds of issues and chances are you've never met someone on TPN because it's rare but not THAT rare. And the last several chapters where he discusses a macrobiotic diet is very disjointed and the whole tone of the book changes. I have no clue what those chapters even have to do with the rest of the book. And the last chapter wraps things up way too well, like a fairy tale. It leaves a bipolar taste in your mouth, so to speak.

I'd like to rate it higher because it brings awareness to Total Parenteral Nutrition and is perhaps the only memoir of it's kind but I can't bring myself to recommend this to anyone.

So admittedly I have personal issues with this book and I realize this is a strange sort of review but if you take anything away from my review, it is this- This book SHOULD HAVE been extraordinarily relevant to me because I am in a similar situation but even I did not like it. That says a lot. And while I could give you more of a plot synopsis, I want to leave it at this. I was the perfect target audience for this memoir (and in general a big fan of memoirs) but this book was a huge disappointment!
Profile Image for Amber.
317 reviews7 followers
April 23, 2015
The main reason I decided to read this book when I saw it in an email from goodreads is that this story is about a man with Crohn's Disease, and I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease nearly 6 years ago. I was really hoping I could relate to this man, and have empathy for him, and perhaps even enjoy his story enough to purchase the book, but my hopes were a bit too high.

Let me start by saying that while I had a really rough patch when I was first diagnosed with Crohn's Disease, I have been virtually symptom free since the meds starting working about 6 months after my diagnosis, and that my case of Crohn's does not even come close to comparing what this man has gone through. Nevertheless, I thought I would be able to relate to him, but instead I felt very disconnected with Reiner throughout much of his tale.

First, I don't care for his writing style, which is a matter of personal taste, I suppose, but beyond that, I feel like this story should have been titled, "The Jewish Man Who Couldn't Eat." I want to be clear, I have no issues with him being Jewish, it's just that I felt the book was a lot more about his Jewish culture and upbringing than it was about his struggle with Crohn's, which is where I think some of the disconnect came from. I understand that we wanted to convey to his readers how we was affected by the fact that he couldn't eat the food he was raised on, but it was a bit too much and detracted from the main story of the book. He also seemed to have a lot of self pity, which began to bug me after a bit. He really struggled to find meaning in his situation, and I just have a low tolerance for people who get really negative about their lot in life. It was getting more and more difficult for me to continue with the story. I began the book by reading it, but despite the fact that I wanted to hear how the story ended, I couldn't bring myself to pick up the book and keep reading. Lucky for me, this book is also recorded on cd, which is how I finished the second half of the book - I just listened to it while I drove my car and did my housework.

In the end though, I had more sympathy for the man than empathy, and while I could relate to some of the story he was telling, it wasn't enough to keep me interested. It certainly wasn't the worst memoir I've read, but it was far from the best. I wish him lots of luck and hope he has found, or soon finds, a solution to coping with his Crohn's and finds a way to get into remission.

Profile Image for Gerald Curtis.
340 reviews5 followers
September 27, 2011
I felt miserable the entire time I spent with this book. I didn’t expect to “enjoy” the book, being a true account of a man and his family’s struggle with Chron’s disease. The degree of suffering I endured as I read about his struggles is a testimony to the effectiveness of his account.

I read the book because I have a niece, whose husband died young, due to this disease and I wanted to know more about it and more about what she and her children had been through. I had always thought he was an unusually positive, happy guy, but now that I have some insights, I marvel at how he always came across at family gatherings and wish I’d known him better.
Profile Image for Todd.
81 reviews11 followers
September 7, 2011
Have you ever thought about what it would be like to not be able to eat or drink? Not to fast, not to go without food for 30 hours in support of starving people in Africa, but to really go with nothing passing down your esophagus for longer than a week or two? Welcome to the life of Jon Reiner, who suffers from Chron’s disease, leaving him helpless to his body’s attacks against his own digestive tract. Having lived with the disease since his college years, Jon offers up a unique insight into the mental and physical suffering that often accompanies chronic disease and disability. Both depressing and intriguing, his story left me feeling saddened for those afflicted with this terrible disease but enlightened about how Jon was able to deal with his circumstances and deal with the daily battles that he waged with his own body.

The Man Who Couldn’t Eat begins, as all good books do, with an excruciating account of pain and misery as Jon lies on his apartment floor, unable to stand or essentially help himself as he experiences an acute digestive attack that literally floors him. His mind begins to wander, wondering what has triggered this pain and suffering. Was it the dried apricots he ate earlier in the day? Was it the leftover food he indulged in last night to clear out the family refrigerator? From this point, Jon launches into an autobiography of sorts, detailing his childhood, pre-Chron’s adolescence , and finally adult life, all centered around food. Unfortunately, Jon’s lot in life was to be a “foodie” long before he developed Chron’s. His principle memories of his childhood revolve around food, and he bases much of his modern identity on his Jewish culture and the ties to food that he has had throughout his life. Therefore, discovering that he has a disease that basically robs him of the ability to eat food, any food or drink, is akin to saying that he cannot breathe. It is as if his identity is taken away, never to return. Jon then details his painful recovery and subsequent battles with his disease, which literally almost kill him. He is forced to go NPO, or nil per os in latin, meaning that he cannot eat or drink anything for a prescribed period of three months. Although surrounded by food left by well-meaning friends and family, he must sit on the sidelines and watch his family bond and develop together as he drifts inert as an outsider. His insight from this experience is phenomenal. It is a contrast between food love and food hate that exists in such extremes that it is truly mesmerizing.

I have to admit that I went into reading this book knowing little to nothing about Chron’s disease and being a bit skeptical about Jon’s obsession with food. With my medical knowledge limited to other specific diseases, I was familiar with certain disease processes physically, but I was at a loss to the mental toll of disease by and large. After reading this book, I have nothing but the utmost respect and compassion for Mr. Reiner. To endure what he had to; to face the reflection of failure in his family’s faces every night, knowing that he was not only unable to be a dedicated father, nor a provider for the family must have been devastating. The physical toll of his illness was extremely hard to bear alone, but adding the mental stress and depression must have been unimaginable. However, his ability to persevere onward and survive this black hole in his life is a testament to the type of person Reiner is. The lessons that his experience left him with are invaluable, and the strengthened relationship he has with his family is inspirational. It is as if food both took away and gave him back his life. I found it an invaluable read that made me think about myself and my relationships with those around me. Definitely check it out, it’s getting published today! You’ll be glad you did.

Todd (Reflections of a Book Addict)
http://wp.me/p18lIL-yu
Profile Image for Jill Furedy.
593 reviews50 followers
October 20, 2012
I've been having a lot of issues in connection to a former surgery from my crohn's disease, (scar tissue is closing up my intestine and food can't make it through), so this seemed like something to shake up any thoughts of a self pity party. I guess I expected his scenario to be a lot worse. He couldn't eat for a few months, which is totally hard and obnoxious, but I thought it was going to be a permanent situation based on the title. So partway through the book, I was thinking how I'd feel more sorry for him if he felt less sorry for himself and then wasn't as sympathetic to him as I might have been. However, I'm sure given the circumstances, it's hard not to feel sorry for yourself. My surgery was for a perforated intestine as well, with fistula issues at the surgical site, but fortunately I was only NPO for a few days after the surgery and never had to deal with a food pump.
I could totally relate to his cravings for food that are on his 'do not eat list'. I've never been a big meat eater...I'd maybe have either chicken, beef or bacon once or twice a week, but as soon as it started making me sick a couple months ago, I would smell In & Out burgers from across the parking lot at work at be dying to go get one. Or I'd smell a neighbors grill going and want to hop the fence. And his wanting to lick a French fry made me laugh, because I've threatened to do the same with popcorn, which I used to love and eat a few times a week and now two kernels will send me to the ER. I've not actually succumbed to that desire to lick the food though, unlike in his story.
I felt very bad for his wife in quite a few chapters of this book, which hopefully will remind me to be less obnoxious and self absorbed when I'm feeling unwell. I was curious to see what became of his macro diet. I'm not sure I could even try that one. I'm with him in the frustration of there not being a clear right and wrong thing to do to feel better. Even if they pointed at me and said..."you made bad food decisions and now you will pay...never eat carbs again". I would wail and kick and scream about the unfairness, but there would still be some relief in having some kind of definitive answer. I've not yet taken a stand about getting off meds after 12 years of maintenance meds and most issues being complications for surgery and not flare ups, thought I've refused to try different drugs or escalate to the newer trendier drugs just cause the docs feel the need to do something.
I do like to read about others experiences to compare how things could be worse, how things are similar and what experiences are still unique. So I would possibly recommend this book for that reason to people with Crohns, colitis, etc. I might suggest it to someone without the disease only if they specifically were looking for medical memoirs or looking to understand a bit about digestive diseases. On the other hand, the author did a 20 minute interview on Radio Lab that pretty much sums up the book, so that would work too.
Profile Image for ILoveBooks.
977 reviews10 followers
August 30, 2011
http://livetoread-krystal.blogspot.co...

The memoir opens with Reiner telling the reader a little bit of background about himself. He is a glutton in a greyhound's body. He has to live in a self-imposed exile from many of the foods he enjoys eating. He lets the reader in on the pain he experiences due to Crohn's. His own kids must eat healthy due to his fear of passing on the disease to his children compounded by the fact that his wife has diabetes in her family. He goes on to tell the reality of living with Crohn's disease. The reader will be taken through a very detailed account, he holds nothing back.


The memoir is told from Jon's point of view, it really adds to the book. The opinions of his children, wife, and friends are less subtle, but the are in the book and help the reader to form his/her own opinion on Crohn's from different viewpoints. The events range from excruciatingly painful (when he is having an attack) to mildly painful (when he attempts to eat light and follows an extremely restrictive diet). The idea of Crohn's disease is awful to those of us who never experience it, but it is rare to receive a first-hand account; Crohn's will become much more real to the reader. This memoir is recommended to readers who enjoy nonfiction, reality, diet books.
Profile Image for Alison.
127 reviews26 followers
May 12, 2013
I have never been so relieved to finish a book and have it no longer claiming any of my precious time. There are a few lovely sentences peppered here and there, but for the most part the writing is awful. Tons of boring, unnecessary details and side stories, disjointed jumping around and the author's voice itself is beyond wearing. He obviously finds himself to be very clever but yet can't seem to figure out why no one ever laughs at his jokes. He tends to focus on the negative, both in the people that surround him and his situation.

I would have quit it after the first few pages but forced myself to plow on ahead because I'm going through such a similar experience. I wanted to silently commiserate / see what he gained from such suffering. (Spoiler: not much.)
17 reviews
February 26, 2012
Speaking as someone with Crohn's Disease I at first found this book masterful the way it accurately described the same type of turmoil I went through. About half way through the book I found I disliked the amount of self pity the author was displaying, it became more unbearable than Crohn's symptoms. I got about 75% through the book when I had to just set it down. Would not recommend.
Profile Image for Marla.
385 reviews21 followers
September 15, 2011
"In the sensuality of eating, the nose teases and the mouth consummates. The intensity of the dinner's aroma is playing havoc with my senses, as so many smalls have lately, and I'm transported."

This quote is used by the author very early in the book to describe how he feels in the kitchen of his own home while unable to eat anything. Jon Reiner has Crohn's disease and has been in and out of the hospital with the disease for over 20 years. Often his bouts end in an NPO - nothing by mouth, which means he cannot eat or drink anything. All nutrition is pumped through IVs and catheters.

Reiner's ability to describe a scene or a dish or an event is miraculous - he is vivid and funny in describing the Hell he lives and how he tries to reclaim the life he once new - the life he desperately wants back. Readers will find themselves almost able to taste the food items he writes of in his memoir. Reiner shows that food and eating is so much more to us than nutrition. Whether right, wrong, or indifferent we all associate memories, experiences, moods, and many other things with eating. Imagine having all of that completely removed. Imagine being so sick you're not sure you'll make it to the next day. Imagine losing your job. Imagine your life completely changed in one moment. Imagine.

Reiner starts readers on this journey by describing a gut wrenching medical emergency he experiences while alone at home. Unable to understand what has happened or what caused it, and how he's going to get help, the memoir jumps off at a gripping pace. Through his trials Jon is frustrated, angry, scared, and gripped with the cravings of food - I think one of the best parts about this memoir is it isn't a, "look what I faced and how awesome I faced it - look at what I conquered" type of book. Reiner is honest - he loses his taste buds to atrophy and that makes him angry. He goes without food for several months, but continues to crave and come close to cheating. He struggles with depression and anger and his marriage suffers great difficulty. Jon doesn't sugar coat his journey and he doesn't try to claim perfection - I loved that.

Whether you love food or not. Whether you have Crohn's, another medical issue, or none at all, whether you've had marriage problems or not - no matter who you are, this book will give you some things to ponder. See Reiner isn't just displaying a food addict's journey without food, he's addressing change - sudden, unexpected, life-altering change and the pitfalls that come with that change.
Profile Image for Heather.
81 reviews2 followers
February 12, 2012
The Man Who Couldn't Eat is Jon Reiner's personal story about returning home from an uneventful grocery shopping trip only to have his stomach explode. As he struggles to heal after a poorly performed surgery, he is put on TPN. He is sent home to spend months living without eating or drinking - absolutely nothing by mouth. His deep surgical wound is left open and covers his gut. The battle to survive takes Jon on an emotional roller-coaster through denial, anger, depression, and finally acceptance. The book chronicles a full year of medical drama, yet it is so much more than the tale of one man's struggle to survive.

Entering this book allows the reader to journey through Jon's past by means of his taste buds. The delicious descriptions of the food of his past are at such odds with the grotesque descriptions of his present medical procedures. It's the ultimate oxymoron, leaving you salivating and yet nauseated in one swoop.

Much admiration goes to Jon's ability to tell it like it is. He does not play the victim, instead fully admits to his selfish behavior. As his family falls apart, he takes his share of the blame and doe not sugar-coat any of it. Jon's battle becomes not only one to overcome the illness but to also reclaim his family.

In the end, this tale is one of balance - the yin and the yang. The continuous balancing act while juggling the needs of a family, the struggles of a career (or lack there of) and the needs of his health crisis is thoroughly documented. Jon's ability to rediscover what is important in life is inspiring. His tale is laced with religion, but it is his ultimate decision to concur that allows him to reclaim his life. There is no glossing over the facts to bring the story to a neat conclusion. Jon continues to struggle to balance his wants with his needs, especially in terms of food. This conflict leads to a stimulating read.
My review as posted on readingforsanity.blogspot.com
Profile Image for Cheryl.
5,545 reviews207 followers
October 24, 2011
I am not familiar with Crohn’s disease. So to read what Mr. Reiner went through dealing with this disease, it was disheartening. I can not imagine having to live with Crohn’s disease. Always having to worry about what you eat not because you want to lose weight but because you never know when some type of food could be like a time bomb towards your body.

Reading about the stool blockage that formed in Mr. Reiner’s small intestine and tore a perforation in his intestinal wall, which caused a rupture was horrible. I could just envision the horrific pain that he was in, while he lay on his kitchen floor waiting for his wife to come home. Luckily, the doctor was able to stabilize Mr. Reiner but in order to heal and avoid further surgery; the doctor informs Mr. Reiner that he will have to have a PICC line for total parenteral nutrition (TPN). Mr. Reiner will be receiving food intravenously.

The way Mr. Reiner described food was better than some food writers. I swear I could almost smell and taste the pastrami from Kazi. While, I did appreciate Mr. Reiner sharing his story, I found this book to be heavy. I could not sit and just read it. In fact I did skim over it in parts. After reading this book, I would never wish anyone to have this disease.
3 reviews1 follower
July 8, 2012
As someone who has lived with this disease since I was 6, I am all to familiar with what the author has gone through. His ability to describe what it's like to live with this disease and survive the more humiliating aspects show his talent as a writer. I am asking my family to read this book because I have never been able to describe what it feels like to live with this disease and he has done the best job of any author I have ever read of putting a face on this disease. He is able to explain why we can't just "suck it up" and how the lack of understanding effects all of our personal relationships. His relationship to food brings this book to an even more interesting place and I hope it enlightens people to what living with a chronic disease is like and how difficult even simple things can become. I must commend Mr Reiner on his ability to tie in the very interesting personal story of his relationship with food and remaining NPO to the more mundane daily tasks and his success in doing both
Profile Image for Aviva.
482 reviews4 followers
November 1, 2012
I don't have crohn's disease, but I do struggle with chronic illness and the way it affects my marriage and my kid. I identified quite a bit with Jon and his struggles to not be the jerk that it's easy to become when just staying alive becomes a struggle.

The author doesn't sugarcoat anything, and doesn't try to show himself only in a good light. The book ends with him experimenting (and struggling) with a macrobiotic diet, and I wish there were an afterward or something to tell us how that worked for him.

I'm not a big fan of memoirs, or even non fiction in general, but this book kept me turning pages and interested throughout. I did have some guilt that I kept finding myself eating while reading it, especially during the NPO part of it. :-) Highly recommended, especially for anyone who deals with their own or a lived one's chronic illness.
Profile Image for Micaela.
744 reviews10 followers
July 27, 2012
I think this book was very poorly written. Although I do not have Chron's disease, I don't think this book would be very helpful to someone who does have it. All this book is a litany of complaints and woe-is-me.

At one point, he even wanted me to feel sorry for him for having to stay at home and take care of the house. Seriously? Many people do that every day and I do not feel sorry for them, I respect them. But only if they don't whine about it like a little baby.

Yes, I know I am sticking to a very minor point of the book, but after that I just lost all feeling for him. He is not a very sympathetic character, and I think instead of telling me to feel sorry for him, he should have shown me why. Show, don't tell!!
Profile Image for Brad.
Author 1 book8 followers
June 2, 2014
I have Crohn's and incredibly I'm going through exactly what JR described in the book. Intestinal rupture. TPN. Nothing to eat. As a fellow Crohn's sufferer, it was really interesting to see how Reiner reacted to different situations. I found myself thinking, 'Oh, I wouldn't have done that' at several intersections in the book. I wish he had gone into more of his history and life with the disease, but instead he wrote about some of his relationships with friends to 'fill out' the book. It was a weird choice. Everyone has friends. The unique angle of the book is the author's life with the disease.
Profile Image for JD Waggy.
1,032 reviews60 followers
August 27, 2012
READ. THIS. BOOK.

Mainly because it's so out there that it's hard to walk away from, but also because I told you to.
So, Reiner's memoir is about living with the fallout of Crohn's disease, which I'd heard of before but hadn't really paid attention to. And the fallout is devastating; much of the book follows Reiner's dry humor in attempting to survive as his own body eats away at itself--the beauty of autoimmune diseases.

The thing of the book isn't that it's beautifully written, or even that I like all of it (the end felt a bit flat to me, writing-wise, as if he knew he was ending a memoir but still alive but had to stop writing somehow). It's that everything was something I could connect with, and I have never experienced the sequence of events that he shared. I don't have kids or a body that's trying to kill me or a life of failed jobs behind me (although I can totally empathize with the no-money thing). But I have had complications with the food in my life (largely self-made, unlike poor Reiner), and I have been sick enough to want sympathy and yet hate pity, and I have memories that are tied to the things I've eaten with people long since past. Reiner's ability to slide in between memories and the present using food as connection feels almost stream-of-consciousness for a bit, but it works, because things set you off to remember other things, like chestnuts in a tiny kitchen. And there are several stories and phrases Reiner repeats that keep the overarching thing together, like familiar signposts of still being alive in the text.

There are some books that make you hungry because they talk about food so much. This is not one of them, at least for me. It also didn't really make me appreciate being able to eat, although the blurbed critics on the book cover felt that way. Instead, it made me aware (again) of the centrality of food in being human, and the necessity of allowing that to be what it is and not get wrapped around appearance, quantity, whatever; that food is subservient to who you are, not the other way around. It is a connecting tool, a measure of presence, and 1,001 stories of the events it marks. Reiner deftly, quietly, hilariously, sadly makes this true, and I'm so glad this caught my eye in the library. I highly, highly recommend it. For everyone.
Profile Image for Fran.
70 reviews
February 6, 2012
When will I learn that a good magazine article does not necessarily make a good book? I was very much looking forward to the publication of this book after reading the original article. Simply put, the article made the point better and more efficiently. I have similar health issues, so just the fact that someone was writing about TPN (IV nutrition) and what it's like to be NPO for an extended period of time, is something I strongly appreciate. I was looking for an intensely shared experience, but I didn't exactly find that here. My difficulty relating was mostly for one reason. He writes almost entirely about food, memories of past meals, and detailed descriptions of meals he wishes he was eating. This certainly helps the reader to understand what it's like to be a foodie cut off from food, but a lot of this felt both tedious and hard to understand based on my experience.

For me, when I was as sick as the author, food was the last thing I wanted to think about (or hear other people talk about, or even watch commercials about). He also seemed to be completely oblivious to the fact that more and more people are living their lives reliant on TPN - fully or partially. I have met people who will never take another bite of food again. I am in no way taking away from the author's horrifying experience. The beginning of the book was absolutely terrifying, and I marvel that he survived at all. But it seems that it would have been respectful, and very interesting I think, to explore his life on TPN as something that is shared and not his alone.

Food is such an integral part of our lives: it's more than sustenance, it's more than pleasure, it's more than social, it's more than love, it's all these things and more. I suppose that I expected too much from Mr. Reiner to tie all these things together in one memoir. But I must admit that I spent most of the time reading this book looking forward to its finish.
28 reviews16 followers
September 27, 2011
Being completely honest here, I know very little about Crohn's disease. It's not an illness that gets a lot of publicity (like breast cancer), and while I knew it had something to do with digesting food, I didn't really know anything else. So, when I heard about this book, I was interested to learn a little more about the disease and Jon Reiner's experience of dealing with this disease. Reiner chronicles one year of living with this illness, following an awful episode where his insides burst (literally). He writes with clarity and ease, where his words are organic and not some romantic version of his illness. He is honest in saying how horrible it is, how difficult it is to maintain stability in his sons' lives but still wanting to be a part of the family, how it's not the food, but the act of eating, that he misses the most. His book is insightful and interesting.

The first chapter started a little slowly for me, but it picked up after that. Reiner's story is chronological, starting with the event that led to his year of no food. There are times where he flashes back to his childhood, describing the food of his youth. The family trips to New York City, Thanksgiving with his large Jewish family, exploring the restaurants of the city with his wife. I never realized how much food plays a role in our lives until reading about Reiner's year of doing without. The only thing that I didn't like about this book were that there were a few times where he went on these politcal tirades for a page or so. It really turned me off to his story. For me, if I want to read about politics, I will get a book about it. Just a pet peeve of mine. Other than that, it was an eye-opening book into a disease that many people suffer from but I knew so little about.
Profile Image for Christine.
941 reviews36 followers
April 24, 2012
As a self-professed “foodie” struggling with managing what, and how much, goes into my mouth the title alone made this book irresistible. Not being able to eat is a concept that I find incomprehensible. Mr. Reiner’s narrative made me understand, with gritty clarity, what it must be like not to be allowed to eat.

We meet Mr. Reiner as he is writhing on the floor of his NYC apartment suffering from a serious complication to his Crohn’s disease. Delirious with pain he slips in and out of consciousness. While he is blissfully passed out his mind takes the reader along on a trip down his personal “food memory lane”. As for many of us food was not just a substance to keep us nourished and alive but also a memory of both good and bad times, celebrations and family traditions. Let’s face it, is there one monumental event in life that is not celebrated, in some way, with food? Hours later, when he awakens in the hospital we take another journey with him … the journey of being NPO (allowed nothing by mouth).

Mr. Reiner spares the reader the necessity of having an accompanying medical dictionary, giving only enough details to make his condition understandable. However, the same sparing of details does not apply to his description of what it is like to receive all nutrition intravenously for the better part of a year. Food, or lack thereof, impacts every area of his life from his marriage, his children, his friends and neighbors all the way through to his own self worth. Mr. Reiner writes as if he is talking to you alone and that makes his memoir seem more personal and more harrowing at the same time. Not the kind of book I would usually pick up but very glad I did.
Profile Image for Kristin.
29 reviews1 follower
November 3, 2011
I met this author when I was down in SF for a conference, we've been in touch, and I'm committed to helping him get this story out there. This is the review that I posted for him on amazon.com:
I very highly recommend this unique & fresh memoir.
Reiner's story will take you on a journey you will be swept up into and deeply moved by, whether you are a Crohn's disease survivor like the author, or have never even heard of this rotten autoimmune disorder. Jon addresses universal human conditions... weakness, fear, vulnerability, trying to overcome self-pity & angst while maintaing the roles of spouse & parent from a sick-bed. This book could have been unbearably depressing, but instead, it is sharp & hilarious. (Meaning, you will enjoy many out-loud laughs, in between gasps & tears.)
This book came to me when I too, was trapped at home, too ill to work. I savored the pages like sips of a fine wine. I have been *that man*: I have licked the salt off a forbidden French Fry in despair & hunger.
But this story moves way beyond the tale of a critically ill man, it deals head-on with the complicated way that illness affects the rest of the people involved when disease takes over. In his reflections of his terrifying acute medical episode, Reiner is able to step outside of his own fear & misery, and write also about the effect that that time had on his wife, children, friends & community of neighbors. As a patient myself, I was at times hit hardest by descriptions of his wife and sons' reactions to the situation, and what this experience meant to them as a family unit. They are all "Crohn's survivors." Bravo.
August 15, 2016
As someone diagnosed with this disease and i have only been battling g it for almost four years now, i was excited about the prospect of reading a book which would have shared the things we face with this disease. My excitement was, however, short lived. The overall concept of the book I am pleased to see people sharing their battles and progress with this disease as it needs as much publicity as it can get! I feel for Jon Reiner and his family, i can relate to some of his stories, however i do not feel this book was worth publishing, it was not encouraging for those who have been newly diagnosed, and i feel it gives a false definition to the disease. Not everyone who is diagnosed suffers because of what we eat. Some of us are not that lucky!
I enjoyed some of the anecdotes, and i always enjoy knowing there are others out there creating positives out of this disease. I just don't rate the book very highly, it became hard to read as he began to feel sorry for himself. Even though, that's an honest reality of disease, the feeling that no one understands! Its not such a good read! I just wish it had done the disease a little more justice! However realistically that will probably never be achieved through one persons memoir!
Profile Image for Crystal Patriarche.
12 reviews18 followers
September 20, 2011
I absolutely love reading a good memoir and this book was by far one of the most intriguing, captivating, well-written, laugh out loud funny, heartfelt, heartbreaking books (memoir or otherwise) I've read all year. I found myself so engrossed in the story of THE MAN WHO COULDN'T EAT - and it's so much more than a food memoir. It's also about marriage, health, survival, family, parenting, wellness, illness, life, tragedy, recovery, desire - desire for more, for food, for life. I absolutely adored Jon Reiner's writing style and cannot believe this is his first book - he's a seasoned writer, a captivating, witty and genius storyteller. This is THE must-read memoir of the year, THE must-read book of the year and you will not be disappointed - readers of all types (men, women, fiction, non-fiction) will devour this gem and still have an appetite for more. Well worth your time to get lost in this hard to believe, impossible to put down book.
Profile Image for Mme Forte.
937 reviews6 followers
October 10, 2011
This is a well-written book, but my lord was most of it depressing. I had a really hard time sticking with it, but I did -- the author's emergence from his absolute lowest state into a sort of acceptance and realization of what he's got (rather than remaining concerned with what he's denied, as he is throughout much of the book) almost made it worth it.
Until I read this, I knew very little about Crohn's disease. I knew it was a disease of the digestive tract, but not how serious it is, much less that it can be life-threatening. If nothing else, I gained a greater appreciation of the gravity of Crohn's and of the disruption it can bring about in one's family and work life.
This is definitely not a "dessert" book -- something that's sweet and goes down easily. It's more like one of the macrobiotic meals Reiner and his wife prepare and consume late in the book: It's good for you, but it's difficult to enjoy and a project to get through.
11 reviews
October 17, 2012
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. As a fellow Crohnie on a liquid diet at the moment I really appreciated the author's vivid in-depth descriptions. It is hard to describe the pain and the crazy food cravings but he did an amazing job with it. I highly recommend this to anyone who wants to understand what we go through -- food can be our best friend and worst enemy. I only ever had to be on TPN for a week after an emergency surgery landed me in the ICU (anastomotic leak following a previous surgery) and I don't remember much because of the painkillers... but I cannot imagine having to be on TPN for an extended period of time.

I didn't really enjoy the book's ending though. I'm glad the macrobiotic diet works for him but in reality, roughage and fiber is not something a lot of crohn's patients can handle (especially those who have had any type of intestinal surgery).
Profile Image for Scarlet.
272 reviews16 followers
May 4, 2012
A lot of memoirs are sort of pointless--most people aren't interesting or self-aware enough to have anything worth writing a memoir about. This isn't the case here. It was sort of depressing to read, but the author is funny and self-aware enough to maintain a somewhat ironic distance that keeps the book from wallowing in self-pity.

The book covers a lot of ground--a painful demonstration of how messed-up the health care system in this country is, a description of a middle-class family one catastrophe away from poverty (well, two catastrophes, since Reiner's medical catastrophe didn't quite push them over the brink), and some glorious passages about food.

Narrator does a great job of reading. There are a few weird mispronounciations but nothing too serious.
Profile Image for Sara.
219 reviews9 followers
June 6, 2012
I picked up this book based on having heard the 04/02/12 Radiolab podcast episode "Guts," in which the author and his story were featured. After reading the book, though, it feels to me as if the subject was handled more concisely and compellingly in that radio segment. The book was an outgrowth of an Esquire article, "How Men Eat," for which Reiner won the 2010 James Beard Foundation Award for Magazine Feature Writing. I may try to get my hands on that article at some point. Word length constraints force a different kind of story-telling, and maybe I'd like that better. Clearly, this man and his family have been through hell and I wish them all the very best. I wanted to like the book more than I did.
54 reviews
October 12, 2011
Interesting look at the life of someone suffering from a bad case of chronic Crohn's disease. At one point the author couldn't eat or drink anything for months and used a pump and catheter in his arm to get nutrition. In periods of remission he loved really good food, and fantasized about it while he couldn't eat. The author received a James Beard award in 2010 for other magazine writings. The book lays out the impact to the man, his family and marriage, etc. Makes me really, really glad that my physical problems (not related to his) are very manageable. Interesting that he never mentions ground breaking treatment with some type of internal worms
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